Dear bloggie,  I think I lose her for good..  I know I missed her bday and it's rly bad for her.... But I haven't had much choice to do anything too..... She just got colder and colder since I came to melb... I knw wht she was thinking and... I knw how it feels... But her words are like sharp knives... They sting a lot and she acts like she doesn't care.... I just.... I dunno what should I do... Bloggie... I'm so helpless now... She's my only best friend and the only person who's keeping my mind off my God damn parents right nw... She's the one who is keeping me sane all this years... I can't lose her bloggie.... But she's trying to push me away... I want to stay so hard and not leave but I dunno what can I do to make her accepts me as her best friend again... Bloggie... My heart hurts so much... It never hurts tht much before.... I know I'm dying.. I know my life will end if she's going to be this way forever... I'm so sorry... I feel so sorry for missing her bday... God please stop punishing me this way...I can't take tht much... I can't take tht much anymore without killing myself.... Please God.... Just help me out....